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The Breakup Thread But hopefully find support

#31 User is offline   delial 

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Posted 23 May 2012 - 04:19 PM

Ok, I guess the way I worded it was confusing...this friend of my ex is someone who has been kind enough to also lend me an ear (via txt). I really appreciate that like I appreciate the supportive messages from you guys. I don't like him more than just a friend and sadly because it's the only right thing to do, his number is gonna have to go as well. I don't want a rebound, I'm emotionally exhausted. Which is why I took to the Jameson. I don't keep booze in my room and no one else I live with drinks. I'm not a fan of drinking but i suppose that's only because I dont do it often. Once this bottle is gone that'll be it. There's not much left. I hung out with my friends Monday and I bought it for all of us.

Nerd brigade, I'd suggest these steps from experience:
1) think about what you want from the rship
2) be honest with yourself
3) talk to him and try to arrive at a compromise like xenoblade said.
4) stick with it

You don't sound selfish. If you start conspicuously conveying how much you wish his friends would go away, that's being selfish
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#32 User is offline   Noiz 

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Posted 11 July 2012 - 11:08 PM

I wouldn't call this much of a break up but something that relates to it. There's this guy I like, we go to club together, went to a school dance together and we just talk a lot. We have this more then friends relationship going on for like 3 months. He recently asked me out but I was just so shocked I couldn't say anything. I like him as well. Now he just told me that he wants to be friends and I didn't even give him an answer. I told him that I like him as well but he told me "just forget about it" and walks away. That hurts.
He talked to me after a week and we started to talk again, then he decided to flirt with one of my friends while I was still in the room. I was pretty sure he knew I still liked him. I literally just left the room, into the bathroom and cried.
We haven't been talking since he went to Russia for vacation. He always used to comfort me when I was bored.
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#33 User is offline   kenkendazo  

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Posted 11 July 2012 - 11:17 PM

Well, how much time passed between when you didn't give an answer to when he told you to forget about it?
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#34 User is offline   Noiz 

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Posted 11 July 2012 - 11:29 PM

In just a day. D:
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#35 User is offline   kenkendazo  

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Posted 11 July 2012 - 11:31 PM

I dunno, they guy could have been hurt by no response, or he could be like most kids who are fickle from one day to the next and not certain what they actually want.
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#36 User is offline   Dark Stranger 

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Posted 15 July 2012 - 03:32 PM

Remind me again why I'm "weird" for not liking traditional monogamous relasonships again? Cuz I don't think that going through these type of events over and over again is worth it. :/
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#37 User is offline   Kii 

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Posted 19 July 2012 - 01:14 PM

You're not "weird" for not liking traditional monogamous relationships.Your reasoning is weird, though.
Intimacy with another person always has the potential to lead to hardships, whether it be a one-night-stand or a four year marriage or something in between.
If you can't deal with that then maybe it's best to spend your time alone.

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#38 User is offline   Dark Stranger 

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Posted 19 July 2012 - 08:41 PM

It's not the hardships. It's the reasoning behind most of them that turn me off to traditional relationships. Prime example was with my brother and his now ex-fieance. 4 months before the wedding after they had some sort of arguement at the bar after her rollar derby game he calls and asks if he can stay the night. After explaning the the events which took about 30 minutes she comes to my house too. We have a huge talk/argument that lasts into the wee hours of the morning and while my brother is willing to do anything to keep this relationship together her reason for breaking it up was, "i'm not where I wanted to be at this point in my life." WTF?! So life didn't turn out like you wanted so it's somehow his fault your not a famous business design artist living in a big city? When he even asked if she still loved him she just goes, "I don't know". They had been together for 5 years before this happened and NONE of this had come up til right then.

There are tons of other reasons and I know I might be sounding like I'm trying to come in here and persuade people that somehow it's wrong to want that kind of relationship. But I'm not. I just wondering why everyone keeps going on this rollarcoster of, "I meet the perfect guy/girl! Everything is awesome and we are perfect for each other." to "I don't understand them anymore/we fight all the time now. Our perfect lives are OVER!" then some times they hit the ground point of "nobody loves me, everythihng sucks, etc." Then they get right back on to the begining as soon as they meet another person. I just see this over and over and go, "Am I the only one noticing this?"
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