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D-i-l-l-e-m-a! trust me, you have to read this...

#1 User is offline   otaku_man7 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 05:12 PM

So, I was engaged for a while. The lady I was seeing was also into anime. So I brought her to her first convention. It was acen. She loved it, so she came back with me a second time. Everything was happy happy bliss bliss. But then everything went horribly wrong 3 months ago. We ended up breaking up (I broke up with her). So she is still going to the con. That alone kinda sucks. But the worst part about it is that she couldn't get a hotel room in time and she is stuck in my room. We didn't talk much after the break up, but when we did talk it usually ended in something along the lines of death threats. Maybe they weren't quite death threats, but suicide seemed like a good option when I got off the phone (j/k). So there's the dillema. I try to be nice to her as of lately so that things won't be horrendous at the con (such as waking up with her standing over me grasping a newly purchased gunblade or kunai, ready to pounce). As of lately the "nice" thing has been working (unless you count the occasional angry text messages I've received). But things I can tell are beginning to go back to the sour-route. What do I do? Any advice?
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#2 User is offline   Rawk z3r0 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 05:41 PM

Ignore the stuff that is going wrong, and focus and acknowledge the things you want more of. :)

#3 User is offline   Isamu 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 05:43 PM

For your own sake tell her she needs to find another room, that is if the room was reserved by you.
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#4 User is offline   otaku_man7 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 05:53 PM

View PostIsamu, on Apr 29 2008, 11:43 PM, said:

For your own sake tell her she needs to find another room, that is if the room was reserved by you.


Well there I was being the nice guy and saying it was ok (this is when she wasn't acting as crazy and I felt somewhat guilty for breaking it off) for her to stay in my room (which I reserved with my credit card. But lately things aren't going the way I hoped, and I'm beginning to wonder if it was a bad idea to do the generous thing and not let her end up sleeping on a couch somewhere or something (more likely having to drive across town in order to get to the con and I know nobody likes having to do that).


How much are labotomy's?
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#5 User is offline   otakucomedian_thefirst 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 05:57 PM

View Postotaku_man7, on Apr 29 2008, 06:53 PM, said:

Well there I was being the nice guy and saying it was ok (this is when she wasn't acting as crazy and I felt somewhat guilty for breaking it off) for her to stay in my room (which I reserved with my credit card. But lately things aren't going the way I hoped, and I'm beginning to wonder if it was a bad idea to do the generous thing and not let her end up sleeping on a couch somewhere or something (more likely having to drive across town in order to get to the con and I know nobody likes having to do that).


How much are labotomy's?


lol...i dont know man...but...idk...just try to be on peaceful terms with her...and mabye that anime con magic will spark things back up...u never know man^^

#6 User is offline   otaku_man7 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 06:02 PM

View Postotakucomedian_thefirst, on Apr 29 2008, 11:57 PM, said:

lol...i dont know man...but...idk...just try to be on peaceful terms with her...and mabye that anime con magic will spark things back up...u never know man^^



Forget the sparks dude. There is no way in he*l I'll put myself through that again. I won't allow it. If that happens, the only sparks I'll be seeing are the ones from the toaster after I drop it in the bathtub with me. lol. j/k
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#7 User is offline   otakucomedian_thefirst 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 06:06 PM

View Postotaku_man7, on Apr 29 2008, 07:02 PM, said:

Forget the sparks dude. There is no way in he*l I'll put myself through that again. I won't allow it. If that happens, the only sparks I'll be seeing are the ones from the toaster after I drop it in the bathtub with me. lol. j/k


ok...didnt know the sititation sorry

#8 User is offline   rupert003 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 06:45 PM

Wow. You know, the SAME thing almost happened to me. I was with this girl for a few years, we got engaged, broke up, and there was the whole issue of acen hotel room. I did the best thing anyone could've done in this situation, be a complete butthole. For my and my friends' sake I told her to get her own room and stay away from me.

I really understand how hard this situation could be for you, but do yourself a favor and prevent "accidents."
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#9 User is offline   otaku_man7 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 08:13 PM

View Postotakucomedian_thefirst, on Apr 30 2008, 12:06 AM, said:

ok...didnt know the sititation sorry


Don't be sorry. Its cool. lol. I was just kidding around. I appreciate the support, so don't worry. We have like 9 people in my room, and 2 of my best friends are going with me to the con so I don't really see myself spending much time around her. I just don't like the idea of being in the same room with her. lol
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Possibly: Death the Kid or Archer (Fate Stay Night)
And for sure: ANBU Kakashi 99.9% completed

#10 User is offline   otaku_man7 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 08:16 PM

View Postrupert003, on Apr 30 2008, 12:45 AM, said:

Wow. You know, the SAME thing almost happened to me. I was with this girl for a few years, we got engaged, broke up, and there was the whole issue of acen hotel room. I did the best thing anyone could've done in this situation, be a complete butthole. For my and my friends' sake I told her to get her own room and stay away from me.

I really understand how hard this situation could be for you, but do yourself a favor and prevent "accidents."



Wow, I don't think I could do that. I'd like to, don't get me wrong, but I don't want to be that guy. If anything happens, it will probably be just drunken arguments. lol. It sure is a small world eh?
-Acen cosplays 09-
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#11 User is offline   Kasin 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 08:23 PM

hell has no furry like a womens scorn...just today my love kicked me out of the care. it's off and on sometimes, i just say good luck!
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#12 User is offline   otaku_man7 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 08:30 PM

View PostKasin, on Apr 30 2008, 02:23 AM, said:

hell has no furry like a womens scorn...just today my love kicked me out of the care. it's off and on sometimes, i just say good luck!


Thanks, I'll need it.
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#13 User is offline   Kankokujin 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 11:08 PM

I'll say this. I don't think she meant all the death threats. Only an insane person would actually go and do something with a gunblade.
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#14 User is offline   Kasin 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 11:38 PM

think of it this way also, arrange you sleeping habits, if she sleeps at night, sleep i the morning, you will never meet then
Anime: hell girl, & trigun. Manga: Soul eater. / Games: Dragon Age, DCUO, batman, & soulsilver.i'm a rini fan boypokemon friend code: 2836 0346 5412 battle anytime, need to get my gold/silver code. wii code: 0061 4530 7677 7629. XBL: hitherkasin & PSN ID: kasin13in 2011 i will be cosplaying as gene starwind & kouga, also w/ my daughter we will do pokemon trainer red/ash & eevee/pikachu. in 2012 we will do hit girl & big daddy, also mini moon & tuxedo mask. in 2013 we will do wizardmon & kari with a gatomon plushie (ty teko!) also mystic gohan & pan. I will also do green ranger some day.

#15 User is offline   TekoMuto 

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Posted 29 April 2008 - 11:57 PM

rape

that will solve it.
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#16 User is offline   jackspicer 

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Posted 30 April 2008 - 07:05 AM

View PostIsamu, on Apr 29 2008, 11:43 PM, said:

For your own sake tell her she needs to find another room, that is if the room was reserved by you.

I agree.

Either tell her buh-bye, or just think of her as just a roommate, though if it's a one bed put her on the floor.
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#17 User is offline   sailorgaia 

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Posted 30 April 2008 - 08:00 AM

View PostTekoMuto, on Apr 30 2008, 12:57 AM, said:

rape

that will solve it.


LOL's: Teko, you've been on 4chan too long, methinks.... ^_^


Seriously, tell your ex that while you thought at first that generosity was the thing to do, you really think it would be better for both of you if she found other rooming arrangementa. She cannot be friendless--especially at conventions--and must have another pal that would have room for her. Honestly, I can't understand what's going through her head to ACCEPT such an invitation to room with an ex. That is a huge red flag right there. It would have been different if you both had broke up from each other, determined to be friends, but an angry breakup and rooming together afterwards will only spell evil for both of you and trust me, it will ruin your convention.

Years ago, I had a friend who was rooming with someone who had a one-sided attraction to her & I will never forget what DRAMA it caused them. It was just an uncomfortable weekend for both of them and they weren't even fighting. Alcohol that was somehow procured by (at the time) underaged infatuated male only brought out the anger in him about it all. It got ugly fast. You could have a similar situation happen.

No, you need to put your foot down, step it up, and tell her like it is. Guilt or no guilt, you need to stick with the decision you made (breaking it off with her in all way shapes and forms) and realize that when you create these type of situations, they will only hurt both of you more. True fact.
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Post icon  Posted 30 April 2008 - 08:23 AM

View PostIsamu, on Apr 29 2008, 06:43 PM, said:

For your own sake tell her she needs to find another room, that is if the room was reserved by you.


I agree. ACen's supposed to be an event to enjoy and get away from issues that usually take over our lives before and after the con, so seriously... if any drama of that sort is going to stop you from having a good time, you ought to tell her straight up. It's not fair that she won't give you the right to your own joy.
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#19 User is offline   s0nicfreak 

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Post icon  Posted 30 April 2008 - 03:30 PM

View PostTekoMuto, on Apr 29 2008, 11:57 PM, said:

rape

that will solve it.


Yes. And remember; she can't say anything while your d**k is in her mouth
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#20 User is offline   otaku_man7 

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Posted 30 April 2008 - 06:11 PM

View Postsailorgaia, on Apr 30 2008, 02:00 PM, said:

LOL's: Teko, you've been on 4chan too long, methinks.... ^_^


Seriously, tell your ex that while you thought at first that generosity was the thing to do, you really think it would be better for both of you if she found other rooming arrangementa. She cannot be friendless--especially at conventions--and must have another pal that would have room for her. Honestly, I can't understand what's going through her head to ACCEPT such an invitation to room with an ex. That is a huge red flag right there. It would have been different if you both had broke up from each other, determined to be friends, but an angry breakup and rooming together afterwards will only spell evil for both of you and trust me, it will ruin your convention.

Years ago, I had a friend who was rooming with someone who had a one-sided attraction to her & I will never forget what DRAMA it caused them. It was just an uncomfortable weekend for both of them and they weren't even fighting. Alcohol that was somehow procured by (at the time) underaged infatuated male only brought out the anger in him about it all. It got ugly fast. You could have a similar situation happen.

No, you need to put your foot down, step it up, and tell her like it is. Guilt or no guilt, you need to stick with the decision you made (breaking it off with her in all way shapes and forms) and realize that when you create these type of situations, they will only hurt both of you more. True fact.


I don't know what to do man. We ended it on a pretty good note I suppose, and then things went well for a little while and then the evil threats of impending doom started. Then she began to plot against me by using my friends. After the latter part occured, I began to feel it was a bad idea to share a room with her. Like I said before, the room is in my name, but if I kick her out, she will find a way to turn the rest of the group against me. She's clever like that. Its like a strategic battle that has to be played very carefully. There in lies the dillema.
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#21 User is offline   otaku_man7 

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Posted 30 April 2008 - 06:13 PM

View Posts0nicfreak, on Apr 30 2008, 09:30 PM, said:

Yes. And remember; she can't say anything while your d**k is in her mouth



That is now the funniest thing I've heard all week. I just fear the teeth, lol. :excl:
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Posted 30 April 2008 - 11:25 PM

Set her on fire and unicycle away from the scene of the crime.
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#23 User is offline   Kasin 

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Posted 30 April 2008 - 11:43 PM

View Posts0nicfreak, on Apr 30 2008, 04:30 PM, said:

Yes. And remember; she can't say anything while your d**k is in her mouth


that was just sick

and wrong, but it got a little chuckle
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#24 User is offline   Imaurel 

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Posted 01 May 2008 - 05:58 PM

The good news about ACEN is she'll probably be passed out.
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#25 User is offline   Myrddin 

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Posted 01 May 2008 - 08:17 PM

If I were you, I would have a little chat with everyone that is staying in your room and discuss it with them. See what their position is on the whole thing and go from there.

#26 User is offline   Takkun2021 

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Posted 02 May 2008 - 12:54 AM

View Postotaku_man7, on Apr 29 2008, 06:12 PM, said:

So, I was engaged for a while. The lady I was seeing was also into anime. So I brought her to her first convention. It was acen. She loved it, so she came back with me a second time. Everything was happy happy bliss bliss. But then everything went horribly wrong 3 months ago. We ended up breaking up (I broke up with her). So she is still going to the con. That alone kinda sucks. But the worst part about it is that she couldn't get a hotel room in time and she is stuck in my room. We didn't talk much after the break up, but when we did talk it usually ended in something along the lines of death threats. Maybe they weren't quite death threats, but suicide seemed like a good option when I got off the phone (j/k). So there's the dillema. I try to be nice to her as of lately so that things won't be horrendous at the con (such as waking up with her standing over me grasping a newly purchased gunblade or kunai, ready to pounce). As of lately the "nice" thing has been working (unless you count the occasional angry text messages I've received). But things I can tell are beginning to go back to the sour-route. What do I do? Any advice?


Just make sure she has her own key to the room, and that whenever the both of you are in there, that she's sleeping. Other than that, just go enjoy the party that is ACen, and avoid contact as much as possible.
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#27 User is offline   LeatherGoddessSchu 

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Posted 02 May 2008 - 12:46 PM

My advice is simple: If you don't trust her, tell her to get her own room. If this means she has to get a room at an unconveniently located hotel (like, say, she has to walk for an hour.... or take a train or taxi...or drive)... then so be it.

If she is antagonizing the situation, tell her "no". It's your room, your money... If she failed to get a room, she can make arrangements on her own.. or skip the con. So she's out what, $50, tops, for reg. (and that's WAY over-estimating.)

What's important is that you feel safe and comfortable with the arrangement. If you're not, don't do it.
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#28 User is offline   otaku_man7 

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Posted 04 May 2008 - 07:03 PM

I plan on getting my economical stimulus check before the con, so if things get a little shady with her, then I'll probably end up kicking her out and make her go to our friend's room. I don't want to get shunned in my own room, and I won't allow it to happen. We'll see how things go this year. I'm getting all sorts of f**ked up and I plan on having a d*mn good time. I can't wait. Thanks again for all the support guys, I may just end up doing that unicycle thing. lol
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#29 User is offline   Sayuri-chan 

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Posted 04 May 2008 - 07:51 PM

That's a good idea. I've read through other people's suggestions and they are right. You shouldn't have to play mediator in your own room with someone who has made it more than clear that they don't want to be romantically with you, and they aren't acting like they want to be your friend either. It kind of sounds like she's just mooching off of you because you have a room in the hotel. >.>;; *gives hugs* Don't let her push you around in your own space, and if things really get that bad, I'm sure your friends that are with you will realize that you were being the better person and trying to just be nice and give her a place to crash. While a bad idea in general to share space with an ex, I think it shows your true character by doing such a thing to begin with. (A really nice guy!)

I hope you have a great time at the con, and seriously, don't stress yourself out and don't let her do that to you either. Conventions are all about having fun, and even if you weren't at a con, no one should let their ex stress them out to any extent like that. Decisions were made, if she still wants to keep things going, then maybe its time for someone to give her a reality check.
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#30 User is offline   sentinel28a 

  • Mad Irishman
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Posted 04 May 2008 - 07:56 PM

I say kick her out before the con. If she's that messed up where you're worried she'll do something (and if she's able to turn your friends against you, they're not really your friends, but hers), do it now while there's still time.

Ben Da Mad Irishman
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